About Me

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I like to think of myself as the 'crazy mom of four'. I'm 31 years old and I love my life, my kids, my husband and my God. "He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose." Jim Eliot

Saturday, May 22, 2010


I'm not sure where to begin. I have so many things to say about my massage experience tonight, but I am not quite sure which part to start with. Do I start with the part where I confused tanning with getting a massage? Do I explain that I was up until after 1am and only got about 6 hours of sleep, thus I was absolutely exhausted most of the day? Do I explain that I was kind of 'out of it' all day long?

OK...everything I said above is true. Kris and I went out last night, thanks to a good friend who watched our kids overnight. We had a great time, but didn't get very much sleep. Kris less than me because he had to get up and go to work at 6:30am. Though you shouldn't feel too sorry for him because he took about a 3 hour nap this afternoon, and I did not. So I was already operating on little sleep.

I had a really hard time getting through the day, even with the help of some caffeine. My eyes were burning and my mind felt foggy all day. I put in about 2 1/2 hours of work this afternoon, barely. I was planning on working 4, but couldn't last any longer, as I was afraid I would fall asleep at my desk.

After work, I went to the Tan Co. When I signed up with MassageLuxe, they gave me a coupon for $100 in free tanning, so it seemed silly NOT to do it. What I love about tanning is how relaxed it makes me feel and how loose it makes my muscles. The bronzing of my skin is just an added bonus! Let me just say this about the Tan Co. They really REALLY want to sell their lotion! I listened to the worker try to sell me lotion for 10 minutes before she would let me go tan. This is not the first time they've bombarded me with my "need" to nourish my skin before, during and after tanning. Well, I don't have $500 to spend on lotion. I make my own thank you very much, and I told the lady that today. And yet she still kept going! Oh well...I'm sure she makes a commission or something off of selling lotion.

Anyway...that is just a side story. That's just to set this up...so we can talk about tanning and how much you take off. I won't go into detail...I'll just note that I don't want a tan line, and I'm pretty sure that is a fairly universal opinion on the matter.

That being said...after tanning, I went home and cleaned up the living room. By the time I was done it was time to leave for my massage appointment. Off I went, so ready to relax and let the stress and anxiety of the alarm fiasco melt away. I was supposed to have a woman giving me the massage. That's on my paperwork and has been from the beginning. But the first time I went, a man did the massage. It wasn't bad and he was very respectful. I didn't feel uncomfortable at all.

For whatever reason, the same thing happened tonight. I got a man. When I called to see if they had any appointments for the evening, the receptionist told me that the girl who would be doing my massage was really good. So, I breathed a small sigh of relief, just because a female massage therapist will allow me to relax even more than a male massage therapist.

Imagine my surprise when a man comes in and tells me that he will be my therapist. Um...OK... So he takes me back to the room and tells me to undress to my level of comfort. In situations like this, let me just tell you, my level of comfort INCLUDES my panties! Plus I think that if I were a therapist, I would think "Um...this person is REALLY creepy. Do they really think I'm going to work on their girly parts?"

My only explanation is that I was really tired and my brain chose that exact moment to stop working. It wasn't until I laid down on the table that I realized my mistake. And at that point, I was warring with my mind...should I get up and correct the mistake or just hope he doesn't notice? If I get up, is he going to walk in right as I am in the midst of donning the undergarments that were never supposed to come off???? OH THE HORROR!!!

So I stayed right where I was. All in all, the man was very respectful and didn't seem creeped out about it. But as I was laying there getting my massage (which was WONDERFUL by the way), I started thinking "I wonder what massage therapists talk about with other coworkers." At my job, my coworkers and I talk about our jobs and our vendors and we especially discuss the idiots that we sometimes deal with. So I furthered the thought, wondering if this guy was going to go into the break room after the massage and discuss how disgusted he was by my state of undress. Seriously though...what do they talk about? Do they get people who berate them or treat them unkindly? Are there weirdos that darken their door? Are there clients that just irritate them? What do you think?

Have you ever done anything like this? Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you accidentally did something you never intended to do?

***My husband just read this and wants me to add, for those who don't know...I was covered with a blanket the entire time. He didn't realize this and so he was imagining something completely different than how I described it above. If you don't know, you lay on a table completely covered by a sheet and blanket. They just uncover the part they are working on and they never work on the 'private parts' as we call them here in our house.***


  1. I just have to say... I'm soooo impressed you go for a massage! This is a direct violation of my own "do not touch me!" rule. If I even think about getting a massage, I get creeped out. But, then I read about or talk to others and it doesn't sound so bad. ; )

    I hope you were able to relax and not wig out on the minor costume glitch. ; )


  2. Yes, I know this contradicts my whole "I don't like to be touched" proclamation. It's different with this though...as I know what is going to happen and I know WHY it is going to happen. If I didn't have such bad neck pain all the time, I would be a lot less likely to sacrifice my comfort level! A massage is completely different than someone touching me or hugging me...it really is. Plus, I have warning before I go, so that I can convince myself it's different! You should go for one...it's a lot less threatening than someone trying to hug you. Seriously! Take it from a fellow physical contact hater!

  3. Yes, I am curious. How is it that you enjoy a massage? I would think it would freak you out simply because of the "touching" involved, you no-touch lady. :)

  4. Nevermind. You just answered my question while I was typing.

  5. Ohhh I feel horrible for you!!!! But i have done the same type of thing!!!!

  6. I just went to the tan co today, too. I just got the spray tan. But the lady did spend a long time trying to get me to buy the lotions and then she showed me what to do told me to start and left. I got ready just to find out she forgot to set it up. So I had to get redressed and wipe of the lotion barrier cream on my hands and feet just to do it again.