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I like to think of myself as the 'crazy mom of four'. I'm 31 years old and I love my life, my kids, my husband and my God. "He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose." Jim Eliot

Monday, July 21, 2008

Things you can learn from a book

When I first began this blog, it was not my intention for it to become a spiritual journey of sorts. I did not intend to share with everyone my struggles in my relationship with God, but I suppose if it takes that shape, I am ok with that. That being said, as my subject indicates, there really is a lot that you can learn from a book, or rather, from the RIGHT book(s).

As I mentioned previously I am listening to "The Voyage of the Dawn Treader" while I drive. There is a scene where this boy, Eustis, turns into a dragon. And eventually Aslan the Great Lion comes along and leads him to a pool. The idea is that if Eustis will enter this pool, he can cease being a dragon and become a boy again. So he approaches the pool and Aslan tells him that he has to remove his 'clothes' (skin) first. Once he understands, Eustis begins to scratch at his skin and all of his scales fall off. He approaches the pool again, only to realize that he is still a dragon. He repeats this process of removing his scales two more times to the same effect. Finally, Aslan says "You will have to let me do it." Eustis agrees and what he finds is that Aslan can remove his 'skin' except that it is painful. However, the end result is that Aslan removes it much deeper and thicker than Eustis had been able to the three times he tried on his own. It is only once his skin is removed that he can enter the pool. What he finds when he enters the pool is at first very painful but then almost immediately it is soothing and refreshing, and once he steps out of the pool he is a boy again. And he is no longer the cranky, mean little boy he had been before he became a dragon. He is a much nicer boy, who though he continues to lapse back to his old self, is trying to be good and is the better for his experience as a dragon.

Anyone who has ever had any kind of relationship with God can clearly see the connection here. For us, Aslan is God. WE are the dragon. We can finally decide we don't want to be a dragon (sin) anymore. So we try and try to remove our scales on our own. And everytime we fail. Finally, God tells us that HE will have to do it. So if we surrender ourselves to him and let him, he can remove the evil that encases us. But it will be a painful process as he strips away what we have become. But it is only God who can strip us deep enough to truly cleanse us and make us new again.

I am finding that though I am resistant to change, and am resistant to surrendering to God, his Spirit is still breaking through and I find that I am hearing him once again. And while I am in this place, I can only hope that I will continue to hear God speaking and feel him moving and that someday soon I will lay down and let him strip away the scales from this dragon I have become.

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