My medication is in full swing within my body. It feels good to feel alive again. It feels good to be able to get out of bed in the morning. 3 days this past week I got to work by 7:30am (one day by 7am). This, my friends, is miraculous as before I was lucky to make it to work before 9am. Fortunately for me my schedule is obviously somewhat flexible. But because I got in earlier, even with leaving at 3pm most days so I can be home when the bus comes with my kids, I haven't had to work in the evenings and don't have to work Saturday to make up the hours. I'm still getting the hang of managing my anxiety/panic attacks. I have gone from taking the Xanax 3 times a day to primarily only taking it before bed to help me sleep. The last two evenings I have taken it while the kids were still up, having been feeling more on edge than usual. But it's nice that I am not dependent upon it! And the Rozerem, now that my mind isn't constantly churning (because I take the Xanax before bed) is actually doing it's job and helping me fall asleep and STAY asleep. This hasn't happened in a long time. I tested the theory of whether or not the Xanax helped me sleep. Sure enough-the two nights that I didn't take it in conjunction with the Rozerem-I could not fall asleep and kept waking up. So for now, the Wellbutrin, the Xanax and the Rozerem are a great evening cocktail. And because I am sleeping better and because the Wellbutrin is now fully in my system, I am less overwhelmed and anxious and therefore do not need the Xanax on a regular basis. I am happy about this, as there is always the concern of becoming addicted to certain medications.
Kaleb and I have gone to the psychologist twice now. We go back this coming Monday, and then 2 weeks from that day as well. It is good. It is necessary. It is expensive. But it is worth it. I am calmer with Kaleb (and the others as well) with my medication but also with the new techniques/revelations from the therapy and Kaleb I think really likes that attention and he is actually really excited to go to his appointments. I think that this is a good thing.
We are gearing up for a big trip over spring break, which begins on Friday. Friday is not technically part of spring break, but it may as well be. There are parent/teacher conferences Thursday (so the kids of course have yet another half day after being off a whole day today too) and then are off again on Friday. I think it is odd that they are doing it this way...but it is kind of nice for travelling I suppose. You kind of get an extra day and a half head start. We don't, because I think Cindy may still have school that day and we didn't realize they had this day off until last week but that's beside the point. So I am planning to take off Friday to be home with the kids, and then I can get everything packed and ready for our long journey to Hershey, Pennsylvania. I am looking forward to it. It will be nice to get away, though I will still need to do some work from there so that I can afford to take time off in June when Kris and I go to Miami.
This is what happens when I wait until 1:00am to start writing. I babble on with useless information that no one but me really cares about. But that's ok...because as I have said before...this is my blog and I can write about whatever I want! :-)