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I like to think of myself as the 'crazy mom of four'. I'm 31 years old and I love my life, my kids, my husband and my God. "He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose." Jim Eliot

Thursday, September 3, 2009


I love music. I always have. Music speaks to me. It moves me. Sometimes it makes me happy. Sometimes it makes me sad. Sometimes it takes me back to my childhood. I can never listen to Meat Loaf "Objects in the Rearview Mirror" without the memory of my sister and I driving through Painted Hills with the top down on our dad's Lebaron Convertible!

Once, in college, I sang in a group, for a whole year. It was a big deal for me. I had NO confidence at all, especially when it came to singing. My sister has a beautiful voice. Truly amazing. And she plays the piano. The 'gift' fell to her. However, I am fortunate enough that I can carry a tune, and I LOVE to sing harmony. Sadly I am not talented enough to hear it like some people-for me, like with everything else I've ever done, I've had to work really hard. Except for, it would seem, getting pregnant-seemed to do that pretty easily! But I digress...

I was SO nervous before each perfomance that year in college. We had to sing. In front of people. There were even a couple of songs that I had to sing solo on. Those terrified me. But the more I practiced, the more comfortable I became. I never did gain confidence, so much as I lost a little fear. I had to suck it up and just do it. Because half of my room and board was riding on it! Honestly, while I love singing and music, I tried out because I wanted to save my parents some money on tuition and I hoped it would help me build some confidence. And while I could be wrong, I do believe that they let me in more because they needed warm bodies (or voices in my case), rather than basing it on pure talent. Because as I mentioned above, it is my sister, and not me with a strong voice.

All of that to share this new series with you. It starts next week. This is the director's cut series premiere. This show makes me so excited about music! It gives me chills when they sing at the end - and really leaves me longing to be a part of something like that. Now if I could just get over the intense fear I have of other people hearing me sing!! Anyway, if you have about 45 minutes, check this out. And then, start watching it next week when it begins. It's called "Glee".

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