About Me

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I like to think of myself as the 'crazy mom of four'. I'm 31 years old and I love my life, my kids, my husband and my God. "He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose." Jim Eliot

Sunday, December 28, 2008

I like routine

I'm realizing that it is difficult for me to take long periods of time away from the warm safety of my own home. I have really loved being back in my house...the kids having plenty of space...it's just nice to have a home. I am thankful for the blessings that I have. Not that I regret living with my mother-in-law. It was a great learning experience for all of us and it really made Kris and I appreciate our home. I am thankful for Cindy's willingness to put up with us for as long as she did.

I have been away from home for just 4 days and am already craving what feels to me like the safety of my home. I'm constantly on edge lately, probably worried that the kids will get hurt or break something, or annoy someone. I am thankful for my parents' generosity in letting us stay here all week. I truly am. I appreciate them putting up with us-there's a lot of us to put up with, as my brother and his wife and three kids are staying her too. But I realized this evening that I like my bubble. I've known that...but it is times like these that remind me how much I like my bubble. There is a reason they call it a 'comfort zone'. It's comfortable. I have become such a home-body. I like to be home. I like to be in MY space. I like the kids to be in THEIR space. I like knowing where everything is, and knowing that there is nothing that the kids will get into and break, or swallow. If they color on my walls and floors, well they are my walls and floors. It's not as big of a deal. And fortunately the kids haven't done anything like that. I am just starting to feel overwhelmed by anxiety with the 'what if' they do. And ultimately it isn't a big deal...my mind knows this. But it doesn't ease the anxiety I feel the longer I am away from home. "Do not be anxious about anything." This is a hard Scripture for me. I do the exact opposite on a regular basis. I am anxious about almost everything!

The kids are still up...it is after 10pm here...but they all 4 took naps today until about 5:30pm so as long as they are occupying themselves quietly we are letting them stay up. We are all upstairs in the two bedrooms that are up here, so at least we don't really have to worry about them waking anyone else up.

I kept hearing this soft rumbling noise and I asked Kris if he heard it. He said it sounded like a dog snoring or something. I told him I thought it was Olivia. Sure enough-she is wheezing a little bit. Time to start the albuterol. Hopefully we won't have to worry about her asthma out here. I am glad I remembered her inhalers though or we would have been in trouble.

Our basement flooded yesterday. I don't know much...Cindy was out at the house having to deal with it all while we are gone. We are not really sure how it happened or why or if it will be covered by our insurance but I know it will all work out.

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